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Why I Do What I Do or Happy Birthday, Jason Chan

November 15, 2001 was a special day. Not merely because it was the 21st birthday of Jason Chan, a respected PENN and LGBT community activist/volunteer, though that certainly provided pleasant added value. The day was special for me because it was a reminder of why I do the work I do – and, in that sense, was energizing and reaffirming.

The day began early, at a Board of Directors meeting of the PENN Council for Relationships. This agency provides counseling and education to individuals and couples in the Delaware Valley, with a special commitment to West Philadelphia, which has been its central location since its inception more than sixty years ago as The Marriage Council. One of the reasons, perhaps the major one, I was elected to the Board is the interest of the agency in serving the LGBT community more extensively and effectively. Though I have sometimes felt a bit tokenized, I have also recognized a special opportunity – to educate mental health colleagues and organization volunteers about the LGBT community and to support the development of services that stand to benefit my community.

At 10am, I had my weekly meeting with Erin Cross, Center Associate Director. As usual, Erin was prepared with a list of topics to discuss and matters on which to follow up. She is so well organized and so effective in all she does. Erin has been very generous in her gratitude to me for offering assistance and recognition and whatever increases in compensation I could arrange (which have not amounted to what I would wish). Erin's appreciation for the mentoring I have provided her as a young professional is especially meaningful to me, as I see this role as a vital aspect of my work.

During the following hour, Erin and I met with Beverly Dale and David Dinan, Co-Chairs of the LGBT Center's Advisory Board, to plan the agenda for the November 28th Board meeting. Beverly and David are among more than thirty folks who have agreed to advise Center staff regarding policies, programs, and priorities. Last year, the Board decided to move somewhat beyond "advising" into the realm of "doing." So, among other projects, Board members have been helping the Center develop relationships with College Houses that will provide additional venues for our services and educational programs, design new, easily recognized visual identities for the Center, construct a web survey and focus groups to examine what the Center is and ought to be doing as it moves into its new, expanded home, and explore broadening University policies to include transgender people. These students, administrators, faculty, and alumni, several of them heterosexual allies, are doing this work over-and-above their own studies and employment. Their commitment is extraordinary. This becomes even more amazing when one acknowledges that they are all volunteers! Utilizing and supporting volunteers is vital to the Center's work – and mine.

Early in the afternoon, I attended a meeting, that takes place every six weeks, of the directors of the University's identity-based resource centers – the African-American Resource Center, the Greenfield Intercultural Center, La Casa Latina, Pan Asian American Community House, and the PENN Women's Center. These meetings were initiated a couple of years ago when the directors recognized that we share many goals as well as challenges and assumed that there was much we could accomplish collectively. We were right. We now have a simple brochure that describes the locations, hours, goals, and services of all the Centers that is given out, among other times, at New Student Orientation. We have co-sponsored several programs, including sending large groups to two performances of "The Vagina Monologues." Soon, having jointly applied for and received a one-time grant from the Vice Provost for University Life, we will be developing a collective visual identity that will appear on products such as posters, mugs, and tee shirts made available to the PENN community. Together we can reach a larger audience, and promote our programs and services more effectively, than we could ever do alone. Collaboration is another important part of my work.

Between 4-11pm, I attended four programs that reinforced the central importance of education in my life's work.

The presentation by Suzanna Walters, Director of Women's Studies at Georegetown, to the Lesbian Gay Academic Union was exceptional, intellectually stimulating, and amusing. The talk was drawn from her new book, All the Rage: The Story of Gay Visibility in America, and postulated that, in the last few years, public attitudes toward the LGBT community have simultaneously been advancing and retreating. For example, referring to popular culture, which she did throughout the presentation, Dr. Walters noted that there were three gay weddings on television series at the same time as DOMA (the Defense of Marriage Act) was being passed by Congress and signed by the President. Her audience seemed to be appreciating Dr. Walters' content and style and was pleased to learn that she had found support at PENN while coming out.

I left the LGAU event just before it ended to attend the panel presentation called "That's So Gay: Addressing Stereotypes between the Greek and Gay Communities" that was part of this year's Unity Week on campus. The room in Bennett Hall was full to overflowing with more than eighty people by my count. Panelists – men and women, queer and not, in fraternities or sororities currently, in the past, or not at all - shared their perspectives on stereotypes that members of Greek-letter organizations have about the LGBT community and vice versa. They also shared their views on what life within fraternities and sororities is like for gay and lesbian students. The consensus seemed to be that Greek-letter organizations are hostile environments for LGBT folks, though there have been some exceptions. What was most encouraging for me, apart from the number of people who showed up to listen and share their views, was the willingness of both communities to work on changing the current climate. One of the panelists told the audience he thought that the LGBT Center would be a great resource to assist in the process. That felt good, as did listening to heterosexual students talk to each other about the need to counteract homophobia (as opposed to the, alas, more familiar scenario of LGBT people trying to enlighten heterosexual people).

I saw Jason Chan at the panel discussion and asked him if he, too, was on his way to another program. It was then that he told me it was his birthday and that he was about to begin celebrating. I wished him many happy returns of the day.

I picked up a supper-to-go at Houston Hall and moved on to the program, "From ‘Gay' to Grace," sponsored by the Orthodox Christian Fellowship on campus, featuring members of Harvest International, an organization dedicated to "converting" lesbian, gay, and bisexual people to heterosexuality. Though I was skeptical and saddened by the stories that were recounted, I was heartened that the presenters did not preach hate and, in fact, that they expressed the belief that only love can assist their cause. They had nothing but scorn for figures such as Brother Stephen and Fred Phelps. It seemed to me that, though these people and others like them are surely no friends of the LGBT community, neither are they our most dangerous enemies.

Even though it was after 8:30pm and I was tired, I decided to make a brief appearance at "Oh, God, Yes," the "celebration/conversation of sex as sacred and fun" sponsored by the Christian Association as a response to the appearance of the speakers from Harvest. The desserts were delicious and the program and games were most enjoyable. There was a delightful sense of community. As a result, I ended up staying until after 11pm, leaving full of too many sweets and exhausted.

I hope Jason Chan had fun celebrating his birthday that evening. November 15, 2001 was special for me because I experienced community service, mentoring, collaboration, support, and education all in one very long, but highly rewarding day. And it reminded me why I do what I do.

~Bob Schoenberg is the Director of the LGBT Center.

Dr. Gaylove: ON HEALTH

Depression: Sometimes you just can't snap out of it...

Depression is a much more common problem than most admit or even want to admit. In fact, some studies indicate that up to one-third of patients in primary care practices (i.e. your family doctor or the student health service) demonstrate or suffer from depressive symptoms. But just what does that mean exactly?

Well, like everything in life, depression is different for everyone. Some patients report, feeling "blue" or "down in the dumps." They may even report uncontrolled bouts of crying over seemingly meaningless things. Strangely, others report being "keyed-up" or irritable all the time. But depression is much more complicated than that.

Persons may also have intense feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or hopelessness. They can lack the ability to concentrate or even make simple decisions. Some patients cannot get out of bed, while others cannot go to sleep at night. Often people also report that they have lost interest in activities that they previously enjoyed (hobbies, sports, etc.).

Commonly, depression results in vague complaints that send people to report to their doctor: headache, excessive sleep/fatigue, insomnia, weight gain/loss, stomach complaints, change in sex drive, etc. Often significant resources are spent on medical work-ups that reveal no abnormalities.

So, why am I telling you all this? One of the problems with depression is that very few people want to admit that there is any possibility that they could be suffering from depression. There is still a great stigma surrounding depression. But looking at the numbers above, anyone suffering from depression is in good company. People who are depressed are not weak and they are not failures. More importantly, people cannot just snap out of depression. The good news is that it can be controlled, with help from a health-care provider.

Two of the many triggers for depressive episodes are stress or change: divorce, loss of a job, or changes in social structure, the loss of a loved one, and so on. Just the stress associated with moving to college, losing touch with old friends, and having to meet new people can send some people into depression. In addition, studies suggest that LGBT youth are at higher risk of suffering from depression, as a result discrimination or harassment (whether actual or perceived).

The most important thing to know is that there is help. But in order to get it, people need to be seen and diagnosed. If you are suffering any of the above, seeing your doctor is the first step. Why? Rarely, certain medical conditions can mimic depression. Only your doctor can make sure that your overall health is okay. Then he or she can get you the help you need for depression, if that is the problem. In addition to the help available directly from your doctor at the Student Health Service, Penn also has CAPS (Counseling and Psychological Services) or the Penn Women's Center available to provide counseling for students.

So, what can be done about depression? There are many treatments: medication, counseling, behavioral modification, social services, and even phototherapy (in certain cases). Only your health care provider can help you select which option will work best for you.

~David Dinan is a fourth year medical student, currently completing a pathology fellowship. Post-medical school he plans to go into pediatrics, with an interest in the health of LGBT youth. He also serves as the student co-chair of the LGBT Center Advisory Board.

OUT & In-Focus: Marc Stein '94

When I was assigned the alumni interview for this edition of OUTlines, I was nervous. Although I have conducted interviews before, I have never had to interpret or write about them in this format — not to mention the fact that I was assigned the person I was interviewing. In my other experiences, I had control over whom I talked to and if the interview wasn't going anywhere, it was easy for me to find someone else. I e-mailed Marc Stein with trepidation, explaining who I was and what format the interview was probably going to take. He replied with a pleasant, "Sure, why me?" Ummmm... because the Director told me to? But that was not an adequate answer. The interview provided the answer, at least for me.

Marc Stein was a Ph.D. student at Penn in History (1989-1994). Since then he has had a fascinating and busy career as a queer academic, teaching and writing about sex, gender, sexuality, and history, and how they are all intertwined. He currently teaches at York University in Toronto, Canada, and is working, along with a few colleagues, toward creating what he calls a "sex, gender, and sexuality studies programme" there, as well as on a new book. Stein also chairs the Committee on Lesbian and Gay History, an affiliate of the American Historical Society, for which he recently completed a survey of academics who wrote or are writing their Ph.D. dissertations on LGBTQ history. The results were published in Perspectives, the newsletter for the American Historical Society.

In 2000, Stein's groundbreaking book on Philadelphia gay and lesbian history, City of Brotherly and Sisterly Love, was published (a copy is available in the LGBT Center's Reading Room). He currently has a three-year grant to conduct research on U.S. Supreme Court cases involving Supreme Court decisions regarding sexuality (including birth control, abortion, interracial marriage, obscenity, and homosexuality) in the 1960s and 1970s. On top of all this, he has also been on the lecture circuit, speaking about his research throughout the U.S., including Penn, Case Western Reserve University, and the American Bar Association.

Before coming to York or even Penn, however, he worked as an editor for the prestigious Boston-based national newsweekly Gay Community News. After leaving an all-gay environment, he said, Penn was something of a shock. Although he had several gay and lesbian colleagues, and had professors who were supportive of his research, he found himself within a definite minority within the greater Penn community. He wrote: "On the negative side, there were few courses in LGBTQ studies, there were horrific antigay incidents on campus, and there were both overtly antigay policies and flagrantly heterosexist practices." He went on to say, "Perhaps the strangest aspect of my time at Penn was that for three years I was involved in a primary relationship with a woman, while continuing to identify strongly as gay. At times, it was quite fun to watch the confusion as people tried to reach new queer understandings of what it means to live outside of strict identity categories. But it could also be exhausting."

Stein's path toward tenure status and academic acceptance seemed equally exhausting. Before coming to York and gaining tenure last year as an Associate Professor, he did a post-doctoral fellowship at Bryn Mawr College and taught history, including courses on U.S. women's history and queer history, for two years at Colby College in Maine. As he said, "I spent many years looking for secure employment, and I'm now one of the lucky ones in queer studies in that I've been hired and tenured. So it's a struggle. But I don't now anything that's worthwhile achieving that doesn't require a struggle."

I was fascinated by Stein's descriptions of queer academia. Although, as he said, his position was a difficult one to attain, what he gets to explore within it is enviable. Queer academia gives Stein and other scholars a space for thinking, writing, and conversing that combines, as he mentions, "politics and pleasure in ways that might not otherwise be possible." He went on to say that "being a queer academic puts me in one of the few spaces our culture has for developing a politics of sexual justice." How many people can claim that for their careers?

When I asked Stein if he had any advice for aspiring queer academics out there, he replied: "I think it's key to identify excellent programs with queer mentors, teachers, colleagues, and communities. For all aspiring queer academics, I think we have to continue to push collectively for more queer courses, more queer content in courses, more queer resources. And I think it's important to be strategic, to choose battles carefully, and to make important alliances with intersecting fields like race and ethnic studies, gender studies, etc."

So, now I can answer Marc Stein's question of "Why me?" Because he is a Penn alum who has undertaken a difficult but rewarding road in his career, and who does valuable and interesting work that does credit to both the Penn community and to the queer community both academic and otherwise.

~Bethany is in the Reading/ Writing/Literacy Program at the Graduate School of Education from Rhode Island.

Homecoming

Is ten o'clock on a Saturday morning too early to hear a bunch of jocks talk? Hell no.

But maybe it was too cold. Or rainy. But no — we had champagne to deal with the former and the sun decided to "come out" and help us deal with the latter.

Then, of course, it helped that we had the body heat of the thirty people who showed up to hear Dr. J. Douglas Toma, professor at the Graduate School of Education, moderate the PennGALA (Gay And Lesbian Alumni) panel discussion entitled: "From Amazons to Athletes: Taboos of Women in Sport." The Alice Paul Center, the Penn Women's Center, and Women's Studies cosponsored the event. After opening with some thought-provoking rhetoric, the panel, moderator, and audience members engaged in an interesting discussion regarding the state of women, in general, and queer-women specifically within athletics, especially at Penn.

Two current athletes, Monique Horshaw and Jen Moore, provided insight into the state of athletics at Penn today. Currently, athletics is self-sufficient and does not depend on the rest of the University proper for much else. Aside from being isolated down on 33rd between Spruce and Walnut, Monique and Jen agreed that they would not be surprised had they found out that a coach in the department refused to recruit queer athletes. The panel and audience cited the ongoing battle with "that coach" at Penn State who even promises to cut athletes who turn out to be queer, even after they have become established members of the team. While no coach at Penn has admitted to this discrimination, there must be a reason, and this is just one of many possible reasons, that there is only one "out" athlete on campus.

Panelists agreed that outreach programs from other University communities, such as the LGBT community, would help athletics become more diverse, inclusive and understanding of the needs of various groups and subgroups of people that may play on their teams. For example, the LGBT Center teamed up with Penn's other resource centers recently at a resource fair sponsored by the Athletic Department. Dr. Ruth Hall and Endla Burrows — a sports psychologist/former Penn employee and former Penn athlete, respectively — along with the non-student members of the audience, however, expressed the view that when they attended Penn, it seemed to be a more accepting climate for LGBT people, even in athletics.

The panel closed a little after eleven, amidst raised hands and comments yet to be stated. Many of the panelists graciously answered questions and engaged in conversation after the panel had officially ended. The overall reception of the panel was positive and a good beginning to what appears to be an ongoing conversation at Penn.

After the panel, audience members and newcomers feasted on a brunch of smoked whitefish, salmon, bagels, fruit, juice, tuna, lox and champagne. Old friends reunited and new ones were made in the Amado Recital Hall, Irvine Auditorium. Following the brunch, the rain clouds moved out and the sun crept onto the concrete as PennGALA members their friends and family marched to Rhodes Field to cheer on the Penn women's soccer team.

~Jen Moore is a senior English major, Women's Studies minor originally from New Jersey.

Queer History Month Wrap-Up

The month of October marked Queer History Month and included National Coming Out Day at the University of Pennsylvania. The LGBT Center and PENN's queer student organizations celebrated Queer History Month with a number of fun and educational events. Throughout the month, the PENN Bookstore featured a display of books related to coming out and queer history.

National Coming Out Day was observed on October 11, 2001. This date marks the anniversary of the March on Washington for LGBT Civil Rights in 1987. Locust Walk was decorated with rainbow panels and members of QSA and ALLIES distributed "I Support National Coming Out Day at Penn" stickers. Students, staff, and faculty were asked to wear these stickers to show their support of queer and questioning members of the PENN community.

Between October 15th and October 19th, ALLIES displayed a series of beautiful banners on Locust Walk presenting a timeline of LGBT events throughout the twentieth century. In the midst of that week, on October 18th, the LGBT Center and SPEC Film cosponsored a viewing of the documentary, "The Celluloid Closet." The film examines the negative and positive images of gays and lesbians in cinema throughout history and the difficulties faced by lesbian and gay actors.

PEARL, PENN's Eagerly Awaited Radical LesBiTrans, hosted a potluck dinner on Monday evening, October 22nd. Dinner was followed by "Chutney Popcorn," a fabulous film about a young New York woman negotiating between her traditional Indian family and her lesbian lifestyle. Later that week onThursday, October 25th, Dr. David Azzolina, librarian and English Department faculty member, presented a lunchtime lecture entitled "Red and Blue and Lavender: Gay Life at Penn since WWII." David shared the history of gay life at the University of Pennsylvania over an intimate lunch at the new Graduate Student Center.

The month ended with the Halloween Hoedown, a party primarily sponsored by the Queer Student Alliance with help from PENN's other undergraduate and graduate LGBT groups. The dance, held in the Hall of Flags at Houston Hall, was attended by nearly eighty people in a variety of exciting costumes. A mixture of exciting decorations, square dancing, a wonderful DJ, and pounds of Halloween candy helped the party end the month on a celebratory note.

~Preeti Advani is the Center's Social Work intern and is originally from New Jersey.

Strictly

Strictly 
Under wraps
No trespassing
We are heavily under guard ...
And for good reason.

We are dangerous, after all.

There are more of us than
	they are comfortable with.
We are hidden in their clothes 
	and in their towns.
Sometimes we say "hi" to their children.
We work in diners, doctor's offices, schools, gas stations...
We are everywhere and you can't always tell us apart.

Is she?
	Is he?
Hate the sin, not the sinner...
You can change...
Gossip, slander, speculation, dogma, propaganda
All around one thing –

Who we love.
Who we are happy giving our hearts to.
Who we feel safe with.

This is the source of all the controversy.

Basic human rights are 
questioned and stolen
		based upon someone's 
interpretation
				of what love
    					and happiness
						must involve.

You are only allowed to love someone "like that"
If one of you has a penis and one of you has a vagina –
And you were born with each of these body parts, respectively.
People are quite comfortable judging 
as long as they aren't judged in the same manner.

We exist.
We hurt.
We rejoice.

We stand strong.

We can't be ignored.

And we will love who we want to love.

~Jennifer Armstrong is a sophomore Fine Arts Major originally from Long Island, NY.