Dating/Domestic Violence: Dating Violence, also called relationship abuse, is defined as a pattern of abusive behavior used by one partner over another.  There are various forms and degrees of abuse that may occur, including: emotional abuse, sexual abuse, economic abuse, and physical abuse.  

No physical violence needs to occur in order for a relationship to be abusive. However, it is important to know that emotional and psychological abuse often escalate to physical violence in time.

Examples of abusive behavior:

• Excessive possessiveness and jealousy
• Hitting, slapping, pushing, strangling
• Pursuing sexual activity when partner is not fully conscious, is not asked, or is afraid to say no
• Preventing partner from getting or keeping a job
• Coercing partner to have sex without protection
• Threatening to spread secrets and/or rumors (outing)

 

Warning signs:
It often difficult to recognize abusive behaviors, especially since they usually aren't revealed in the beginning of a relationship. Below are some warning signs of abusive behavior that you may want to consider when examining your own relationship, or your friend's:
Does your partner…

• Blame you for how they treat you, or for anything bad that happens?
• Put down people, including your family and friends, or call them names?
• Try to isolate you and control whom you see or where you go?
• Nag you or force you to be sexual when you don't want to be?
• Accuse you of flirting or "coming on" to others or accuse you of cheating on them?
• Refuse to listen to you or show interest in your opinions or feelings? ? ?things always have to be done their way?
• Ignore you, give you the silent treatment, or hang up on you?
• Threaten to kill themselves if you break up with them, or tell you that they cannot live without you?
• Experience extreme mood swings. . .tell you you're the greatest one minute and rip you apart the next minute?

*For more information about warning signs and how to help a friend check out The Red Flag Campaign at www.theredflagcampaign.org.

What to do: You do not deserve to be in an unhealthy relationship, and you are not at fault for the situation. If you are worried about your relationship, or a friend's relationship, we recommend you talk with a counselor or professional service provider. There are resources listed on this site which you can contact anonymously to ask questions and get advice.